Raindom Thoughts

Because feeding a child is love. It is. And I don’t ever want to diminish the sacrifice it takes to do it well. And consistently. And without complaint. But standing there, I found myself wondering how many of us grew up believing that a full refrigerator meant we were fully loved. That if the lights stayed on and the plates stayed full, nothing else could possibly be missing. When the truth, the harder truth, is that food is only the floor. It is the first rung on a much tal

For a long time I called that inconsistency. But I wonder now if inconsistency was ever the right word. I wonder if what I was actually doing was protecting something. Because showing up to yourself every day, really showing up, requires you to believe something that this world has spent a very long time trying to make certain people doubt. It requires you to believe that you are worth showing up for.

“Something is in the room. You have felt it before you had language for it. It is old. It is everywhere. And if you get still enough to really smell it, it is putrid. It is the smell of something that was once alive and human being slowly rotted from the inside out. We call it hierarchy. But that word is almost too clean for what it actually is. What it actually is, is a wound.”

We can do better than this. I really believe that. Not because I’m naive… but because I’ve seen it. I’ve sat with people in their most broken moments and watched them choose something different. Watched them decide that the cycle stops here. It can stop here.

This is not about one woman. This is about what 500 years of spiritual and cultural starvation looks like when it meets a ring light and a wifi connection. This is about the grandmother’s kitchen being replaced by a comment section. The elder’s wisdom being replaced by a highlight reel. The ancestral ceremony being replaced by a live stream. This is about us. All of us. Still on the journey back to ourselves. Still sometimes reaching for the mirage because the real water feel

The love I carried and sometimes did not know what to do with. All of it found its way on paper eventually. What I love most about this project is what it does with genre. Because I have never been one thing…. neither is this music. There are ballads that find their way into something that feels like house music. Hip hop revisited through a newer lens. Songs that started in the R&B and hip hop tradition and ended up somewhere that now feels like country, or alternative